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Kara A. Reifert

Kara A. Reifert

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Defending Arizona

08 Sunday Feb 2015

Posted by Kara A. Reifert in opinion

≈ 11 Comments

Tags

ABC, Arizona Robbins, Callie Torres, characters, Disney, equality, gender, GLAAD, grey's anatomy, Jessica Capshaw, lgbt, popular culture, relationships, representaion, Sara Ramirez, shonda rhimes, Shondaland

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In light of recent events, I feel someone needs to give a voice to one of the characters who has become the victim of a lot of hatred among the general Grey’s Anatomy audience. I’m talking about, the once adored, “Good Man in a Storm,” Dr. Arizona Robbins. When we first met this perky Pediatric Surgeon, she instantly captured the hearts of many, myself included. According to TV Guide’s, Matt Mitovich, “she quickly established herself as a fan favorite,” describing her as “a breath of fresh air in the often angsty halls of Seattle Grace.”

I couldn’t agree more. She definitely brought some lightness and a new energy to the series. I mean, who can forget the first time she breezes by Dr. Bailey on her heely sneaks? Has there ever been anyone more adorably quirky than Arizona Robbins?

heelysWho wouldn’t be immediately intrigued by this character? This kind of quirkiness was something that was very new to Grey’s Anatomy. But there was something more to this blonde, blue-eyed, “girl-next-door,” than met the eye. There seemed to be this edge to her. She said it herself, “Don’t let the roller skates fool you. Peds is nothing but hardcore.” And she wasn’t kidding, as you get to know, Dr. Arizona Robbins, you begin to see that underneath that cheerful demeanor lies this bold, self-assured woman, who isn’t afraid to go after what she wants. Just go back to the first time she meets Orthopedic Surgeon, Callie Torres.

I mean, whoa, that is one confident woman. ‘Beat Your Heart Out’ indeed. And yes, it’s at that moment that we discover, Arizona Robbins, likes the ladies, which would go on to make her “the only lesbian series regular in Primetime TV.” Talk about an exciting time for television and equal rights. Having someone like Arizona Robbins on a popular show like Grey’s is important because she represents a lot of people out there who exist in this world, who are very rarely portrayed on TV. What’s great about Arizona is that she’s not some stereotype. She is shown to be a multifaceted character, who is not defined by any one thing, not even her sexuality. Arizona does not wear it on her sleeve. It is merely one aspect of who she is. And that’s what makes her so wonderful. Through Arizona’s story, she has the power to change people’s perceptions and preconceived notions on what it means to be gay. She shows that even though gay people may not be part of “the norm,” they are in fact, normal. They are doctors, they are daughters, they are sisters, they are mothers, they are wives, they are your friends. Heck, they may even be you. Arizona’s presence allows people to get to know someone they may otherwise not have a chance to meet. And as a result, it can lead to understanding and acceptance and even love for someone who might be different from you. Not only that, she can be an inspiration to those who might be struggling to live their own truth. Seeing someone just like yourself is empowering because you realize you’re not alone. If she can be strong and secure in who she is, you can too.  She was such a positive symbol for members of the LGBT community. People judged her on her character, not her sexuality. But given all the drama of the last two seasons, I think people forget why we all fell in love with her. They’re focusing on all the bad. And now it seems because she’s a lesbian she is being a held to a different standard. Take a look at this pic from Instagram:

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Maybe we need to be reminded why she was so well received in the beginning and why it’s so upsetting to see all the venom being thrown her way. Here’s a look back at some of her most shining moments:

Remember this beautiful scene from Season 6 when Arizona tells Callie she never had to “come out” to her parents because she never had boyfriends, ever. Callie was different, as all her life, she had only been with men. So, this being with a woman was all very new for her and was having trouble with her family who was reluctant to accept this new discovery. So, Arizona, ever the voice of reason was there to offer Callie some perspective on where her father was coming from.

photoDespite the many efforts of Dr. Torres to convince her father, “you can’t pray away the gay,” he still couldn’t seem to accept his daughter. (Interesting choice of words here…was this when Callie was still being labeled (by Shonda Rhimes) as a late-blooming lesbian? )

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Anyway, back to Arizona. Seeing her girlfriend still making no head way with her father, what did our strong, loving, protector do? She took it upon herself to defend the honor of the woman she loves by delivering this heartfelt speech to Callie’s dad.

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That scene will go down in Grey’s history. Not only do we see just how good our Good Man in a Storm is, but we also see how incredibly sweet she is when it comes to Calliope Torres. And just how persuasive and moving Arizona can be with her grand speeches. It’s one of my favorite things about her and probably what solidified my love for this character. Arizona Robbins is honorable. She is a person with a strong moral compass and is a woman of strong convictions. Who can forget the time she stands up for George O’ Malley and his decision to join the army?

In addition to standing up for what she believes in, she is also an amazing doctor. One who advocates for her patients and is well-respected because of it. Remember when one of her patient’s families donated 25 million dollars to the hospital, as a result of her genuine concern for their son’s well-being?

Season 6, episode 8 “Invest in Love”

That gesture is a true testament to the kind and caring person Arizona is at core. She doesn’t do things because they’re popular. She does things because it’s what feels right to her in her heart. And no matter how hard she tries, she can’t help but worry, not only for her “tiny humans,” but also for her co-workers and friends. Look how concerned she is about Alex Karev:

But, just like anyone else, she does have her faults. She is after all, human. Arizona can be seen as a little bit selfish and a self-described, “Know-It-All, Type A.” But she is the first to acknowledge that, sometimes, she does in fact, “misread things. And calls a situation wrong.” I don’t think we can forget the elevator scene from season 5 where Arizona apologizes to Callie for calling her a “newborn,” and asks her out on a date.

This was the beginning of their story which held such promise. And was an image of what a stable same-sex relationship could look like. But somewhere along the way, things began to fall apart for this couple and for this character.

Many fans would say, Season 7, signified serious changes for Callie & Arizona’s dynamic and was when we first started to see the character assassination of Arizona Robbins. And when it became increasingly evident that she was being used more as a plot device to advance Callie’s story, than as a fully realized individual. The egalitarian relationship they once shared became unbalanced with Callie calling the shots and taking away Arizona’s voice. It was like Arizona was constantly being punished for leaving Callie at the airport to do work with underprivileged kids in Africa. Sure, the way that situation was handled was not ideal, but in Arizona’s defense, I think she did it with good intentions. She knew Callie didn’t really want to leave her life in Seattle and was fearful Callie would end up resenting her down the line, if she went with her. So, Arizona said, “you stay here and be happy. And I’ll go there and be happy.” It was devastating for both of them. And Arizona’s trip didn’t last long because she realized her love for Callie was too strong and no job was worth being apart from the love her life. So, she shows up on Callie’s doorstep 3 months later in hopes of being reunited with her great love. The look on Arizona’s face when she sees Callie again pulls at your heart strings. And when she says, “you look really pretty,” you can’t help but turn to goo. It was obvious how much she had missed her girlfriend and how much she wanted her back. But Callie was still angry and heartbroken, so she slams the door in her face. They do ultimately reconcile, but not until Arizona learns that in her absence, Callie, had become pregnant by Mark Sloan. And Callie gave her 5 minutes to decide if she was in or if she was out. Arizona had no time to process this information, but was so in love with Callie, of course, she was in. And here begins the modern family storyline that Callie’s portrayer, Sara Ramirez, was so passionate about telling. And where Arizona was suddenly made to feel like second banana to Callie’s baby daddy and bff, Mark Sloan. Any time, Arizona, would express displeasure with this situation and attempt to talk about her feelings, like an adult, Callie would shoot her down and accuse Arizona of being jealous, or that she had a problem with Callie’s being bisexual. Which is a belief we now find out even series creator, Shonda Rhimes, shares, since she recently said, “Arizona has always been a little “dismissive,” of Callie’s sexuality.” I think that’s outrageous and untrue. Sure, there are some lesbians who are “suspicious of bisexuals” because they fear, they “will go back to men.” And some, like Arizona, say, “are you one of those fake lesbians visiting lesbian land?”

arizonafakeBut is that being dismissive? Or is that a legitimate concern? Because some women do visit lesbian land as a phase and after they have had their fun experimenting, they do return to “the normal” heterosexual relationship. Those women are not bisexuals. How was Arizona to know which category Callie truly fell in? When Arizona first met Callie, she had only one brief affair with another woman. And it was when Callie was first learning about her sexuality. And from what Arizona knew, Callie, fell in love fast and hard, with women and men. And had to wonder if it was really about being in love, or about who just happened to be there. Arizona wanted to feel like she was special. That she stood out from the pack and that Callie truly loved her more than anything or anyone else. But it’s pretty hard to feel secure, when you’re constantly being told to put up or shut up by the person who’s supposed to love you most. I think we need to remember some of the things Arizona had to endure while Mark Sloan was still in the picture.

Who can forget the scene from season 7, where a pregnant Callie dictates how the evening is gonna go down? She is to have a foot rub from her baby daddy, while her girlfriend, Arizona, is busy in the kitchen cooking dinner for all 3 of them.

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Is this “normal” behavior of a bisexual person? Or is this more a representation of a polyamorous relationship? Because I don’t know of any other couple, gay or straight, where this would seem acceptable. Do we really think that if this were Meredith and Derek, Addison would come over, spend the night, and give a foot rub to her ex-husband? And we wonder why Arizona would say it looks like some sort of “bi-dream.” That, again, is not bi-phobic, in my opinion. Honestly, it is a stereotype, a negative one, that says a bisexual can’t be happy unless they have both men and women. They’re said to be greedy and indecisive. Not sure what Grey’s Anatomy was tying to convey with this 3-way parenting story, but it certainly looks like they were perpetuating a negative stereotype. Not only that, it looks like they were placing more value on the man in the family unit, than on the lesbian who’s role was constantly being diminished. Just look at the way Mark, Callie, and Arizona leave the hospital after Sofia was born.

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Arizona is trailing behind the biological parents, even though she is the one engaged to Calliope Torres. And these are just a few examples. Let’s not also forget how many times Mark made his way into Callie and Arizona’s bedroom and Callie treated it as a joke, instead of respecting any sort of boundaries.

What’s even more gross than Callie laughing about him walking in on them, is the way the show makes it all about the male getting pleasure from seeing two women making love. It turns it into a joke. Like the time, Arizona, was upset that Mark was looking at her boobs. It made her uncomfortable that he would just stare at them, but what did Callie say, “so, they’re good boobs.” Again, Arizona’s feelings were trivialized. This would become an ongoing theme for Callie and Arizona. Even the day Arizona asked Callie to marry her. Arizona and Callie were supposed to go on a romantic weekend together, leaving their worries behind. No work. No Mark. Just them. But that was not acceptable to Callie, who just couldn’t put her phone down for even five minutes to devote her complete attention to Arizona.

I don’t know about you, but this would make me feel like anything but special. I’d feel like I didn’t matter. But, somehow, Shonda Rhimes and Sara Ramirez are now spinning it to demonstrate how unfairly bisexuals are treated. And using Arizona as a symbolic plot device to illustrate the bias that exists among some lesbians and society, as a whole, toward the bisexual community. Instead of uniting everyone, they’re being divisive in their quest for bisexual visibility. And at the same time, coming across as a little sexist, hetero-normative, and lesbophobic. And if that’s not troubling enough, let’s not forget that in Season 9, Shonda, in an effort to keep the show “fresh” and to give the writers “fertile ground,” she made the decision to have our “Good Man in a Storm” cheat on Callie, during a storm! Something that seemed completely out of character and was ill-timed as well, considering the writers had already made Arizona pretty unlikable in the way they handled her post-amputation storyline. There were many interviews around that period that said the series would be delving in to what that kind of trauma would do to a person and that they would be exploring a PTSD storyline for Arizona, but that somehow never made it to the light of day. None of it was ever fully developed and a lot of stuff was happening off screen leaving the audience to fill in the gaps. And a lot of the writing had become inconsistent. So much so, that in season 10, they had to do a retcon episode to try to explain why the cheating happened. But still, viewers are divided on the issue. Some say, Arizona is flat out selfish. Some say, it was her way of regaining the control she had lost, in her life and in her relationship. That decisions were no longer being made by her, but for her. And the leg was just a catalyst that brought all those deep seeded issues to the surface. She had been a good man in a storm for too long…pushing down her true feelings, in a way to keep order and a way to be a wife for Callie, even if she hadn’t truly healed. Others say, the cheating was a result of Arizona no longer feeling like she was enough for Callie, which she tearfully admits to April, in church, just before Kepner is about to be married. There were other signs that point to this as well. Callie was disengaged whenever Arizona would try to talk with her. Callie asks Arizona who Lauren is and just as Arizona starts to tell her, Callie proceeds to talk about Bailey and how they need to “fix” her.

Sadly, I think Arizona was feeling very much less than and missed how Callie used to make her feel, when they first got together. Callie used to make her feel wanted. And she used to be interested. Just compare the elevator scene with Callie and Arizona from season 6, to the elevator scene with Arizona and Lauren in Season 9.

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I don’t know what was going on in Arizona’s head, but I think she still did love Callie a great deal, even though she cheated. I’m not sure how Callie was feeling at that point, given all they had been through. But she certainly didn’t come across as a wife who was with her wife out of love and want. She told Arizona repeatedly that she stayed with her while she was sick. And she wasn’t gonna run because Arizona stayed with her after the car accident. It was more about obligation than love. And if some of the sides for upcoming episodes are related to Callie and Arizona and why their marriage ended, it makes Arizona’s “irrational” and “biphobic” fears all the more justifiable. And it sets bisexuals back because it only serves to perpetuate the stereotype that women are never enough. That a bisexual woman will always ultimately choose a man. I mean, I am not kidding, but this is from a side to ep 15…

Jean (75 and sweet) — She’s speaking with her doctor and tells her she’s got one tiny problem that she hopes the doctor can help. Her husband has recently died and the gentlemen have started calling. SHE WANTS TO POLISH Herbert’s 9 iron…yes, HIS PENIS. She’s terribly interested in it. In fact, SHE’S INTERESTED IN ALL THE PENISES. But she’s had hip replacement and it’s giving her trouble. She brought cookies. In the next scene she tells Dr. Hall to listen. The hip squeaks. Any way she tries, on her back, on her side, bent over the arm of a couch…(you get the picture). She had the hip replacement 15 years ago but it only started squeaking 6. Her husband didn’t mind. Dr. Hall is concerned. A new hip is major surgery. But Jean is lovely and any man would be lucky to be with her and get used to the sound, just like Gil. That’s not what Jean’s looking for. Gil was the love of her life. He’s the only man she will ever love. But she’s damned if he’s the only man who will ever razzle her berries. Dr. Hall realizes that Jean doesn’t want to be limited. That’s right. She wants to look and sound her best. Dr. Hall adds that she wants a fresh start. Exactly.

Is Dr. Hall supposed to be Callie? She doesn’t want to be limited?

Then there’s this side from ep. 12…

Hillary explains that Todd cares for her deeply, he’s sweet and clingy. And the more he feels, the less she does and they haven’t been together for long, but he wants to take it to the next level. She started pretending to fall asleep whenever he would go on and on about their future. Dr. Rogers says that’s diabolical. Hillary says that today they were walking in the park and he got down on one knee all teary-eyed and she faked fainting. She didn’t realize how close she was to the steps but she had to go with it. Dr. Rogers says she can really commit. Hillary says yes, but not to Todd. 

(Scene 2) Dr. Rogers consults with Hillary in her patient room. Hillary’s leg should be fully healed in about 3 months. Hillary asks if Todd is there. Dr. Rogers tells her she needs to break up with Todd. She can’t take another fall like that. Hillary says she knows she should and she will. Todd enters the room and asks how Hillary is. Dr. Rogers is going to leave but Hillary tells her she can stay. Todd tells Hillary he’s going to take her home and make sure she has everything she needs. Hillary tells him that he’s been so sweet and kind, but she’s been unfair. Todd tells her not to worry about him and he loves her. Hillary looks panicked so she fakes fainting. Todd is terrified and tells Dr. Rogers to help but she is over it. Dr. Rogers tells Todd that what Hillary is trying to tell him is that she wants to break up with him. Dr. Rogers knows that all he wants is to help but it’s not what Hillary wants and she doesn’t deserve it. Todd starts to cry. Dr. Rogers says he deserves someone who wants him there and who needs the kind of attention only he can give. Dr. Rogers puts her arm around Todd and walks him to the door. 

Are Hillary and Todd supposed to represent Callie & Arizona? It would play into what Sara Ramirez has said when talking about their relationship. She wondered, “Did someone lie to themselves when they committed to this relationship?” Or was it about fear that prevented them from leaving? Look at the pic below. One is from season 7 and the other is from season 9. Arizona is talking about her dream, not including Mark, not that she doesn’t want a family with Callie. But in the season 9 pic when Arizona is talking of the future and buying a house for their family, Callie seems detached. She didn’t want to talk about it yet. Why? Because Mark had just died or because she wasn’t really committed to Arizona?

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Because there was yet more evidence to this in episode 10×09 when they went house hunting. Arizona was so excited, but Callie was preoccupied with her phone.

I think Arizona sensed this for a while, which is why she suggested adding to their family. It was a “band aid.” It was a desperate attempt by Arizona to hold onto Callie. Hoping that she would be enough if she could give Callie a baby. And that she would be the one to get pregnant this time. Which heartbreakingly led to a miscarriage. What was even more heartbreaking for Arizona was that her wife wasn’t there for her emotionally. Callie missed the sonogram appointment and didn’t offer her much comfort, other than to say, halfheartedly, we’ll try again. But Arizona couldn’t handle another loss. She had already lost her brother, her best friend, her leg, her baby, and I think, her wife. And that is what I believe led her to the arms of Dr. Lauren Boswell. Callie and Arizona did “try” to reconcile after all of the mess that was season 9 and 10, but as Sara Ramirez has said, “it wasn’t about result. It was about trying.” So, we now know, the result was that they couldn’t fix their problems. Callie finally spoke the truth. She felt stuck with Arizona. And told Arizona that she deserved more. I took it to mean, she deserved someone who loved her and wanted to be with her. And that it wasn’t fair to Arizona to keep making sacrifices for her, if Callie wasn’t truly all in. A sentiment that was kind of alluded to last season when Callie tells Arizona she shouldn’t have to give anything up.

calliegiveupanythingSo, here we are, Arizona is no longer giving things up. She is on her way to becoming a fetal surgeon with the help of Dr. Herman and her fellowship. While Callie is off finding herself, or so that’s what we were told. In reality, it’s been 5 episodes post divorce and both she and Owen Hunt are both trying to get back out into the dating game. This is the “transitionary period,” Sara talked about in an interview post break up. Which translates to taking the series from the Calzona relationship to Callie and her new relationship. They certainly didn’t waste any time. As early as 11×06, Callie and her new pals were talking about how they were all connected by sexual relations and that Callie does dudes too. And who walks in at that precise moment? Her ex-wife. So, is that all she is now, a former sexual partner? Yet again, the lesbian relationship is being shown as less than compared to the hetero relationships on the show. It’s as though Callie snapped her fingers and the marriage was over. We have not seen Callie and Arizona interact. There has been no talk of their child. No talk of the house they bought together. No talk of assets. Nothing. The series is trying to make the audience forget Calzona was ever a thing, so they will be ready to see Callie dating again. Conversely, Owen Hunt, is only now beginning to truly let go of Cristina.  And it’s been nearly a year since Sandra Oh’s departure. Speaking of Cristina, when she broke up with Burke, Shonda said they gave her a full season to mourn the loss of that relationship. I guess the real reason for the Calzona break up was to just put Callie with someone new and take the series into its next phase. Callie and Arizona will come together at some point though, but not until they have healed. And when they do they will begin a beautiful friendship. And will be co-parents. Sara Ramirez has said, “what if they work better as friends? A relationship that’s not necessarily romantic.” And how seeing two women become friends is just as exciting as seeing two women get married on TV. My question is, how will this friendship play out? Will it be shown on-screen? Will it be like a Callie and Mark friendship? When Callie is off on dates, or with her new love interest, will Arizona walk in on them having sex? Will Callie be dismissive of her boyfriend if he wants to be alone with her, if Arizona happens to call? Or will Callie suddenly have grown and through her newfound self-awareness, thanks to her failed marriage and some introspection, now be better at her new relationship? Will she not make the same mistakes this time around? How convenient. She was incapable of boundaries when it came to Mark. Oh, I’m sorry, only when it came to Mark and Arizona. Notice how respectful she was of Lexie Grey when she questioned Callie’s sexuality. No one ever accused Little Grey of being dismissive.photo(2)Arizona was the only one being ridiculous and biphobic. Yet another thing that screams inequality. But all this is supposed to be made better because Arizona is now advancing in her career. And Shonda is keeping her promise, “I will be good to Arizona.” I wonder if Arizona will be shown starting a new relationship? Or will she now become asexual? Or will it even matter, as some fans feel she might not be around much longer. And nor will they as many have already jumped ship.

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Bold Enough To Go Where No One Had Gone Before : Star Trek’s Nichelle Nichols

13 Tuesday Jan 2015

Posted by Kara A. Reifert in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

A Mighty Girl, characters, civil rights, equality, Feminism, FILM, gender, Martin Luther King Jr., Nichelle Nichols, popular culture, role models, society, Star Trek, stereotypes, tv

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A very happy belated birthday to trailblazer, Nichelle Nichols, who turned 82 on December 28th. Sci-Fi fans may know her best for boldly taking us where no one had gone before, with her role as, Lt. Nyota Uhura, in TV’s, Star Trek. Nichols was first offered the part by Series Creator, Gene Roddenberry, in 1966, and has since reprised her role in subsequent Star Trek films, ending with 1991’s, Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country. It just goes to show how much staying power characters can have when they touch the lives of so many. And how much influence they can yield within society, with their ability to empower, provide visibility, and shape our attitudes and perceptions of many different groups. Positive representation is important. And although she was unaware at first, Nichelle Nichols, was doing just that, but it took Martin Luther King, Jr. to make the actress realize just how vital her presence on Star Trek was and what it meant for The Civil Rights Movement. Nichols’ was breaking new ground with this character by challenging stereotypes and breaking racial barriers. She truly was going where no one had gone before. And as result, she gave hope and inspiration to not only the African American Community, but to people everywhere who might have felt they had no choice in what they did in life. Here’s a wonderful piece from, “A Mighty Girl” that highlights her contributions to equality and just how much impact she had in opening doors to the future:

“Nichelle Nichols made television history in the 1960s with her portrayal of “Star Trek” character Lieutenant Nyota Uhura — a breakthrough role that showed an African American woman in a position of power as the fourth in command of a starship. At the end of the first season, however, Nichols was frustrated by the show’s development and considering a move back to Broadway until she met a very special fan who convinced her how important her role on the show was — Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

After Nichols told Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry that she was leaving the show, he encouraged her to think it over. That weekend, she attended a fundraiser for the NAACP and met King who told her he was a “Trekkie” and “Lieutenant Uhura’s most ardent fan.” As Nichols described in an interview with the Huffington Post, when King learned that she was leaving, he urged her to stay, stating:

“‘Don’t you realize how important your presence, your character is? This is not a black role or a female role. You have the first nonstereotypical role on television. You have broken ground’… ‘Here we are marching, and there you are projecting where we’re going. You cannot leave [the show]. Don’t you understand what you mean?’ I told him that when I would go on hiatus from the show, I could come and march with him and he said, ‘No! You’re an image for us. We look on that screen and we know where we’re going.’ It was like he was saying, ‘Free at last, free at last!'”

Nichols did stay on the show with its entire run and went on to make history again in 1968 as part of the first scripted interracial kiss on TV with William Shatner, who played the show’s lead character, Captain James T. Kirk. Nichols’ groundbreaking character had a huge cultural influence, especially as a role model for many African American girls. Mae Jemison, the first African American woman in space, has cited her as an important influence and even used Uhura’s signature line “Hailing frequencies open” during the course of her duties on the space shuttle.”

http://www.amightygirl.com

Grey’s Anatomy, “The Authentic Bisexual Journey,” and The Destruction of Calzona: A Fandom Divided

11 Thursday Dec 2014

Posted by Kara A. Reifert in opinion

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

ABC, activism, actress, Arizona Robbins, authenticity, bisexual, Callie Torress, calzona, characters, Disney, diversity, drama, equality, fans, gay, gender, GLAAD, grey's anatomy, grievance, Jessica Capshaw, lesbian, LGBTQ, marriage, opinion, perspective, popular culture, relationships, representation, romance, Sara Ramirez, shonda rhimes, Shondaland, speculation, stereotypes, television

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Can we talk Grey’s Anatomy and the recent break-up of a couple that was once dubbed MFEO (Made For Each Other) and shared chemistry that was at one time dubbed by Show Runner, Shonda Rhimes, to be comparable to that of the series,’ “Golden Couple,” Meredith and Derek? A couple that Grey’s writer, Stacy McKee, has described as, “Romance: Sweet, epic, fairytale, romance. Pure and simple.” A couple with a fan base so big, they have entire online communities devoted to them. A couple whose wedding made headlines in the New York Times. A couple who inspired legions of lesbians to come out of the closet and helped alleviate a lot of hatred toward same-sex couples. I’m referring to, of course, the beloved Calliope Torres and Arizona Robbins, who together have become known as, “Calzona.” Since season 5, we have laughed with them, cried with them, and loved with them. They were adorable and complemented each other well. Here you had two strong women, both with big jobs as surgeons, and big personalities. One, an “Orthopedic Goddess, who breaks bones for a living,” and the other a “Type-A, know-it-all Pediatric Surgeon, who despite her perkiness, is totally, ‘hardcore.'” The wonderful thing about this pairing was the way they used to communicate with one another. In the beginning, Callie, a character who is sometimes called out for being passive-aggressive and bossy, and usually only see things her way. Not sure if this stems from her privileged upbringing, something that could have led to an entitled mindset, her insecurity, or it’s just something innate within her. Whatever the reason, Arizona Robbins, didn’t let her get away from an argument without letting her position be known. Initially resistant, Callie, would eventually come around to listening to Arizona’s perspective and although she may still have disagreed with her, she did come to understand where Arizona was coming from. And it was absolutely gorgeous to watch. But then, something changed. I wanna say it was around Season 7, when Arizona broke up with Callie at an airport and left for Africa, which, by the way, I believe was only written into the show to accommodate Jessica Capshaw’s maternity leave. However, I do think this is where some of the problems started for Calzona. In Arizona’s absence, Callie finds herself pregnant by her, “Friend with Benefits,” Dr. Mark Sloan. It should be pointed out, that by this point in the series, it was established that, Callie Torres, is not a lesbian, but a bisexual character. It’s an important distinction and one that will come up as a source of contention, not only on the show, but among the fans as well. And that, Sara Ramirez, was the one who introduced this sexual fluidity for her character. She told GLAAD, “I chose this path for Callie. [Creator] Shonda Rhimes collaborated with me on it and the writers, thank god, have gone with it…and I want to continue to develop an authentic journey for this character.” So, for anyone who thinks actors don’t have a say in what happens in terms of story lines for their characters, let this be proof, that they indeed do.

Which leads me to my conspiracy theory as to why Callie in Season 11, episode 5, decides she no longer wants to fix her broken relationship with Arizona and wants a divorce. Let me preface this by saying, this is purely speculation on my part and that I do not have evidence beyond a reasonable doubt that what I’m asserting here is absolute truth, but there has been enough said in interviews over the years that one could come to this conclusion. And yes, I know, this is “just a tv show,” but I can’t help but be a little disappointed by how things ended for Calzona and just felt the need to vent and process out loud the demise of one of my all-time favorite tv duos.

Let’s go back to 2011, shall we? The year that brought us the fairy tale wedding of Callie and Arizona. Look at the images below and all you see is pure love radiating from these two women.

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So, what happened? How could this couple go from being so seemingly in love to a couple that couldn’t seem to fix their “band aid” of a relationship? And had Callie telling Arizona by the end of this current season’s 5th episode, that she’s happier and freer without her, but wants so much for her? “So much more than this…so much more than being stuck with someone who feels stuck.”

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Here’s the clip where Callie breaks up with Arizona – October 23, 2014 Season 11, Episode 5, “Bend and Break”

I’ll tell you what happened. At least what I was noticing off screen. It started around the time of The Musical Event, the episode that aired in March of 2011, just two months before the Calzona wedding. I remember reading an interview with Sara Ramirez where she spoke of how she thought it would be interesting to explore her character, Callie Torres, as single, someone who was unattached, since we never really saw Callie not in a relationship of some kind. I thought this odd, seeing as though she was part of a very popular coupling on Grey’s. And that so much buzz at the time was centered around the upcoming nuptials between the two women. Why would she be saying such a thing? It made me a little fearful that a plot twist could be headed our way and that perhaps, Arizona Robbins, would be killed off the show. I commented about this ad nauseam on the ABC Grey’s forum and people told me I was nuts. It then came out after Callie and Arizona had tied the knot, that for the series’ 8th season, the couple would be allowed some “semblance of normalcy” and would be able to enjoy their “honeymoon phase.” But people associated with the show made it clear that wedded bliss was usually short-lived in Shondaland and that drama was surely headed their way. That line always bothered me…”semblance?” Yeah, didn’t like that that meant, “appearance.” But anyway, I digress. As promised, the early part of the 8th season did deliver happy, loving, cutesy, and in love Calzona.

SARA RAMIREZ, JESSICA CAPSHAW

Still from Season 8 (never made it into the episode)

cal    calbaseballkiss

Then the latter part of the season happened. And here’s when things started to look a little suspect. All of a sudden, out of the blue, Arizona’s best friend, Nick, shows up at the hospital. It turns out he’s dying and had he told Arizona sooner, she probably could have done something to save him, but alas, it was too late and now she has to suffer yet another loss (it had been mentioned previously, that she lost her brother). Which leads to this:

donteverleave

All of a sudden, Arizona Robbins is needy and pleads with Callie to never leave her. LOL When did this become daytime tv? Please enjoy the below clip from the movie, Soap Dish, on how outlandish story lines come to be when dealing with behind the scenes drama and appeasing the stars involved.

Clip from Soap Dish, 1991

You just never know when a story is unfolding organically and in an authentic way, through its characters, or if the story is being driven by plot. Something tells me you could probably make the argument, for either case, when it comes to Grey’s as more story usually reveals itself with each passing episode. But, when it comes to Calzona, some of it, at least right now, is coming off as a little bit contrived just as a means to an end, in my opinion. As it’s been mentioned, since Calzona’s breakup, that what’s ahead for Callie, according to Sara, is that “what the writers have explained is they’re interested in seeing an unattached callie. Who is she at the hospital, what is she like around her co-workers? Do friendships arise, do working relationships improve? Do they not improve?…” Hmm, interesting. A single Callie. Isn’t that something she hoped to see going all the way to season 7? “Anyway, back to needy Arizona and her plea to Callie, just before she boards a plane to Idaho, along with some of the other doctors at Seattle Grace Mercy West. Uh, oh. Flight? Season Finale in Shondaland? I smell disaster, drama, and possible death. And yep, that is exactly what Grey’s fans got right as Season 8 came to a close, that left one character dead by episode’s end, while the others’ lives hung in the balance. It was quite a summer hiatus that left us with the burning question, who will survive? Will there be more casualties? Could Arizona be one of the victims, especially since her wife, uttered the ever so ominous foreshadowing, just before the audience sees the plane go down, “Life changes in an instant. Turns on a dime. One minute you’re miserable and then the next, you’ve met the most amazing woman in the world, and are in love.” Dun, dun, dun. See you in September to find out who lives. So, Calzona fans all across the world spent the hiatus speculating about Arizona’s fate. Only to find out, as some fans predicted, Arizona would be back, but as a result of the crash, was now going to have her leg amputated, which sets the stage for the drama that will ensue for our beloved Calliope and Dr. Robbins. We thought we’d get some grand professions of love and support and innermost fears revealed to each other as they navigate this life changing event. But instead, we’re treated to hostility and obligation. Not to mention frustration and angst, when Sara gave an interview to The Huffington Post on October 25, 2012, where she alluded to the fact that maybe Callie and Arizona don’t belong together and maybe someone lied to themselves when they committed to the relationship, in order to avoid being alone. She really seemed to lay out a lot of the story that would play out over the next two seasons, culminating with their break up and decision to divorce in episode 5 of Season 11. You can read the full interview here:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/10/25/greys-anatomy-callie-and-arizona_n_2012974.html

And now, 2 seasons later, we get an interview from Series Creator, Shonda Rhimes, that basically reiterates everything that Sara Ramirez “contemplated” would happen for Calzona.

“And has Callie’s desire to not be alone meant that she’s stuck in something that she maybe shouldn’t have stuck to? Isn’t that just what a marriage is? You just stick whether you want to or not.”
http://insidetv.ew.com/2014/09/19/greys-anatomy-callie-arizona-spoilers-season11-rhimes/

So, based on this information, it looks like they have been slowly dismantling Calzona for several seasons. And the idea to do this could actually go back as far as season 7, right around the time of their wedding. I don’t know about you, but as a Calzona fan, I find it rather bothersome. It’s very upsetting to learn that they made such a big deal out of this momentous occasion to show a beautiful wedding between two women on network television only to be planning their demise shortly after the episode aired. And what is the real reason for the destruction of Calzona? Who’s idea was it? Was it a way for Sara, Shonda, et al, “to continue to develop an authentic journey for this character?” because as the show reminded us TWICE in Calzona’s break up episode, Callie is a bisexual and is attracted to both men and women.

photo-2.PNG

And she also brought it up in therapy and told the therapist that her bisexuality freaks Arizona out. I don’t like that the show continually makes Arizona out to be bi-phobic, when a lot of Arizona’s insecurities simply stem from the fact that Callie slept with her male best friend, conceived a child with him, and even when Callie and Arizona were a couple, no boundaries were ever set. I mean, seriously, how is this okay? Would you be fine with this situation?

photo-155

Yeah, I didn’t think so. And something tells me if Arizona ever tried to bring her best friend AND former sex buddy into bed with her and Callie, Dr. Torres, would have gone postal. But I’ll save that for another post. I think I will call it, “In Defense of Arizona Robbins.” But, for right now, we will stick with Callie and her journey and her point of view because, honestly, from my where I’m sitting, therein lies the reason for the Calzona break up and the purpose of Callie reminding the audience in Bend and Break that she is bisexual. It was a way to set us up for what is ahead in the Grey’s Anatomy universe. Callie is now free and clear to begin sleeping with other people and she will encounter offers from both men and women. But given the show’s history, I’d be willing to wager, that any of these upcoming rolls in the hay, will be shown to be much steamier when Callie is paired with a man. And we know for a fact that these “hot scenes” are coming in the second half of this season, given a recent interview that talks about going back to the show’s roots of on-call room hookups. Patrick Dempsey told The Hollywood Reporter, “That there needs to be a resurgence in that.” And he said, “I think everybody has slept with everybody, so who else is there?” He went on to say, ‘it’s a teaching hospital and there’s a lot of really talented young actors out there that need an opportunity that we should be bringing them in and rotating them in as interns. I think that’s a possibility, and stirring up the hospital a bit would be a good thing.”

Sara Ramirez offered her take on this possibility as well, stating that, “Callie and Arizona need a “transitionary period” for both characters to process their newfound independence so that they can be comfortable exploring any sort of relationship again.
“It’s not like you’re dead just because you’re single again,” she says. “You’re not; you’re still a breathing human being with needs. It will be interesting to see how people that have been coupled up for so long and share a child consider the possibility of tapping back into that ‘sexy-time-in-the-on-call-room life.”

Get set for episode 10 of season 11, because based on some of the sides out now, it looks like Callie will be propositioned by a woman, played by Amy Motta. Then in episode 12, rumor has it, Callie, will be at a bar, drinking, when she approaches a “hot guy” and asks him to dance, which in the sides for that episode, is described as, “effortless and fun.”

Not sure what will be going on with Arizona during all of Callie’s one night stands, but I’m sure she will be focusing on her career, seeing as though the show already decimated her character, by having her cheat on Callie, then having a fling with an intern, all the while never fully taking the time to develop Arizona’s point of view, which as a result has the left the fandom divided. You’ve now got Team Calzona, Team Arizona, Team Callie, and Team Callie plus any man she comes into contact with…Dr. Owen Hunt or any “fresh man blood,” according to a lot of the homophobic comments you can see on IMDB, the Grey’s Facebook page, and other online sites, who continually wish for the death of the show’s lesbian character, Arizona Robbins. So, given this new direction to explore Callie’s journey, as an unattached bisexual character, you have to wonder if it’s pandering a lit bit to Hetero-normative culture. Will her interactions with men and women be shown to be equal, or will we merely see her being approached by women, while only engaging sexually with men? I’m very curious to see these questions answered as the season continues. And I’m also anxious to see what happens with Arizona. Part of me is worried, that by the end of the season, Arizona Robbins, could be written off the show. Keep in mind, that when she first entered the scene back in Season 5, she was only supposed to be appearing for a 3 episode arc. But after Shonda saw her interacting with Sara off camera, she noticed a “sparkle” and wanted to give them a shot as a potential pairing. So, Jessica Capshaw’s, initial guest star status turned into series regular in Season 6 and has been on the show ever since. But now that she’s no longer with Callie and Shonda has promised that she “will be good to Arizona,” you have to wonder what that means. Does that mean we will spend the rest of Season 11 watching Arizona get back to who she is at her core; a very strong, happy, driven, brilliant surgeon who never wanted kids? And if that’s the case, will Alex Karev, who’s been being groomed as the next Head of Peds take over for Dr. Arizona Robbins? Will the Fellowship that she’s undertaken be the beginning of her next chapter? It seems that could very well be the case, seeing that Arizona seems to have served her purpose for Callie’s journey. According to, Sara Ramirez, “Callie discovered a part of herself before Arizona came along with Erica Hahn. And then she fell in love with Arizona and more of who she is blossomed in that relationship because we were able to see that relationship on screen. When we got rid of Erica Hahn we couldn’t. Basically, it obviously served that purpose that we were able to see Callie in a grounded, loving relationship that had more to do with the attraction, and the mutual respect and the love for one another than anything else, than about gender, which I love.”

So, what does this mean for Callie moving forward? As she begins to get more in touch with herself along this journey of self-discovery, now that she’s divorced from Arizona, will she ultimately start a new relationship next season? And will her next love affair be with a man? As we know, for Callie, “it’s more about the essence of the person or the spirit of a person.” And we’ve already seen her in a long term lesbian relationship. So, logically, the next step for the show would be to explore how she, as a bisexual character, is also capable of having an intimate sexual relationship with a man. And as many of us know, this kind of representation is a rarity on television. And due to this underrepresentation, Sara Ramirez wants to “demonstrate how Callie’s personal journey is a uniquely bisexual one.” And don’t get me wrong, I am all for inclusive, accurate representations, that reflect the diverse world in which we live, but that doesn’t mean I’m not saddened by how it’s being achieved. It hurts my heart to know that Arizona Robbins was merely a part of Callie’s journey, not her destination. And that it looks like Callie’s relationship with Arizona will be used as some sort of visible blue print to illustrate her bisexuality.

I guess all we can say is, we’ll always have the dirty bar bathroom at Joe’s.
kiss

Thanks for the memories. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I think I will continue to mourn the loss of our once perfect Calzona.

Andrew Belle – Make it Without You

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/05/09/business/media/gay-on-tv-its-all-in-the-family.html

http://www.afterellen.com/tv/97202-2011-year-in-review-tv

Bewitched: A Social Message Packaged as a Sitcom

24 Saturday May 2014

Posted by Kara A. Reifert in rhetoric in popular culture, social issues

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Tags

1960s, ABC, acceptance, Agnes Moorehead, authenticity, barriers, Bewitched, civil rights, classic tv, comedy, different, Elizabeth Montgomery, equality, gender, identity, lgbt, marginalization, marriage equality, mixed marriages, popular culture, prejudice, racism, relationships, rhetoric, rhetoric in popular culture, sitcom, social commentary, social issues, social message, society, stereotypes, tolerance, truth, tv, understanding

 

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Remembering, Elizabeth Montgomery, this week, who passed away on May 18, 1995, at the age of 62, from colorectal cancer. The late actress is best known for her role as, Samantha Stephens, on the long-running sitcom, Bewitched, which ran on ABC, from 1964-1972. The series ran for 8 seasons and is considered one of The 50 Greatest TV Shows of All Time, according to TV Guide. It’s one my favorites, for sure. The lead character, Samantha, has spunk, in a time when it may not have been popular for a woman to behave that way. And she also happens to be a witch, who marries a mortal! Talk about scandal!! 😉 In the very first episode we see Samantha meet Advertising Executive, Darrin Stephens. The two fall in love, marry, and shortly thereafter, her identity, as a witch, is revealed to her new husband.

And that sets up the theme for the entire show. And what I love most about the series. Seeing a mixed marriage represented and despite being met by disapproval by other characters, especially Samantha’s mother, the couple forged ahead anyway. It’s why, I think, the show remains so memorable and why it remains so relevant all these years later. The subject of prejudice and racism and marriage equality are conversations we’re still having today. These are issues close to a lot of people’s hearts and it’s great to see them portrayed onscreen, through good story-telling, with humor and emotion, without being confrontational. The series did a great job exposing bias and demonstrated just how misguided society can be about people or groups they really know nothing about, other than what they might have been falsely led to believe. In Bewitched, witches could be used as a metaphor for any marginalized group within society. Replace witch with people of color, the LGBT community, or any other minority group and you’ll see what I mean.

Some of the classic episodes in the series that highlighted prejudice and negative stereotypes particularly well, were Season 1’s, “The Witches Are Out” and Season 7’s, “Sisters of The Heart.”

In this clip, we see Samantha and other witches trying to dispel the negative image of witches. I love the protest signs they come up with, “Witches Are People Too” and how they tell Darrin’s client, “We want the world to know you for who you really are.”

In this clip from “Sisters of the Heart,” we see Samantha and Darrin’s little girl, Tabitha, wanting to be sisters with her friend, regardless of the fact they are of a different skin color.

 

Bewitched, pilot episode. “I, Darrin, Take This Witch, Samantha.” Darrin learns his wife is a witch. And Samantha accuses him of being prejudiced.

 

 

If you’d like to see more Bewitched and really see these issues tackled in a more complete way, the full series is available on Hulu or DVD.

 

 

 

 

Katharine Hepburn

12 Monday May 2014

Posted by Kara A. Reifert in Uncategorized

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Tags

academy awards, actress, comfort, fashion, fashion icon, feminist, gender, gender stereotypes, Hollywood, independence, individuality, JCrew, Katharine Hepburn, menswear, movies, non-traditional, oscars, pioneer, progressive, Ralph Lauren, rebellion, style, tomboy style, trailblazer, unconventional

As someone who is a big proponent of individuality, and overcoming gender stereotypes, it seems appropriate to remember a true trailblazer on that front; Katharine Hepburn.

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Today marks what would have been the late actress’ 107th birthday. The 4-time Academy Award winner truly was a pioneer. Not only in the characters she portrayed, and the way she lived her life, but also, in the way she dressed. Katharine Hepburn loved to be comfortable and that meant she loved to wear trousers. They enabled her to sit on the floor more easily and throw her leg over a chair, if she so desired. Ms. Hepburn’s choice of attire was unconventional at a time when most women wore skirts or dresses. But it was out of this rebellion, that led to her becoming a style icon. She made menswear fashionable for women. And continues to inspire designers today.

Menswear Trend 2012 + Smoking Jacket Ralph Lauren

JCrew, Bass, River Island, Topshop http://speakeasystyle.blogspot.com/2012_12_01_archive.html

 

The Girl with the White Parasol http://thegirlwiththewhiteparasol.blogspot.com/2011/06/movie-review-sylvia-scarlett.html

 

 

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Love’s Been in Front of Us the Whole Time

10 Thursday Apr 2014

Tags

communication, equality, friedgreentomatoes, gender, human rights, love, politics, popular culture, relationships, rhetoric, rizzoliandisles, sherlockholmes, social issues, stereotypes

On a day such as today, March, 26, 2013, there have been many posts regarding the Supreme Court’s Same-Sex marriage hearing. Most have been supportive, but there have been some remarks in the comments sections of newspaper links, etc. that have been less than agreeable, to say the least. Some of the words I’ve witnessed have been absolutely hateful and beyond ignorant. I mean, calling the LGBT community a bunch of sociopaths, really? I just can’t for the life of me, in this day and age, understand the extreme prejudice of some people. I find it not only sad, but to some degree, a little laughable, since a lot of the people who make these bigoted remarks probably enjoy a lot of same-sex couplings and don’t even realize it.

Subtext, anyone? I do believe one of the bigger movie series in recent history has been Sherlock Holmes, with Robert Downey, Jr. and Jude Law. I mean, hello, how can you not see the homo-erotic nature of their relationship? Oh, right, they’re both “involved” with women, so there couldn’t possibly be anything beyond platonic love between the two men. Despite the film’s director, Guy Ritchie, and the actors themselves acknowledging the gay undertones in the movie. If that’s not enough for ya, how about the classic, Fried Green Tomatoes? Um, I understand people interpret things differently, but how can anyone who has seen that film (or read the book it’s based on), miss the love story between the two women? Okay, it could be deep friendship, I guess, especially since the lesbian aspect was toned down a bit for the movie-going audience. But, there are several scenes in the movie, that would suggest romantic love. One in particular is the food fight, in case you were wondering. Although, it’s not an overt love scene, the energy is there. I’ve posted the clip below, in case you’re curious to watch. Even the director of the movie admits it to being Idgie & Ruth making love, albeit metaphorically.

Then, of course, there’s the popular cable series, Rizzoli and Isles. Quite the controversy with that one and the undefined relationship between the two female leads and how ambiguous it is, leaving many to say the two are “married,” without actually being married. I’d wager to bet most fans, men and women alike view them as such. There’s just no denying the chemistry, emotional connection, and affection Jane and Maura share. And there’s definitely some eye-shagging thrown in for good measure. Just watch an episode and you’ll see for yourself. But, alas, you have to keep it somewhat under the radar, so as not to “offend” some viewers who might be turned off, if it actually became maintext. I’ll have to post some links if you are interested in reading, or seeing, more about this topic.

I’ll end on one final note, what is the big deal, really, if two adults, two PEOPLE, love each other? Hasn’t love, in a variety of forms, been in front of us the whole time? Have we not been rooting for different pairings time and time again? We can’t help who we are drawn to, any more than we can control who we fall in love with. So, what is the problem? Aren’t we in need of a little more love in this world? Some PEOPLE just belong together, plain and simple, who cares about gender. A soul mate can be anyone. Someone you’d least expect. Why deny someone the joy of finding out? And once they do, let it be celebrated and recognized. Come on, let’s get back to being the free country our ancestors fought for….liberty for all? Live and Let Live, I say.

Holmes & Watson https://movies.yahoo.com/news/sherlock-homes-game-shadows-gay-love-story-171400112.html

Idgie & Ruth (FGT) “In Flagg’s novel, the relationship between Idgie and Ruth is based more on illicit love than friendship, with a detectable romance emerging between the two. In Avnet’s cinematic abridgment, their strong bond is downplayed as being a dedicated closeness, though a food fight later in the film doubles as a visual metaphor for sex.” http://www.notcoming.com/reviews/friedgreentomatoes

Idgie & Ruth food fight

Rizzoli & Isles TNT Speed Dating Promo http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GeVVZEX8g7M

Rizzoli & Isles LA Times article http://articles.latimes.com/2011/jul/03/entertainment/la-ca-rizzoli-isles-20110703
http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2011/10/20/study-more-than-half-of-women-attracted-to-other-women_n_1021730.html

Idgie & Ruth

Fried Green Tomatoes

Holmes & Watson

Jane & Maura

Posted by Kara A. Reifert | Filed under opinion

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